Who put the 'ween' in Halloween?
... I don't know. Probably you.

'Tis another Halloween here in Madison. This year, however, I will not be making an appearence. I have decided to celebrate Halloween my own special way, by doing homework. And going to the Essen Haus tomorrow. Got to have priorities you know. Nonetheless, I am sure that there will be some sweet costumes out there, and the day started off well seeing the good people from Pulp Fiction.

However, when I got back to my place I realized that Bog still didn't have a costume and desperately needed my help to save the day. (As you may recall, Bog had this same problem last year, but emerged victoriously as Future Guy. Never has there been a more noble and dignified use for the lowly garbage bag.) But back to the story... so Bog needed my help and I sat down with the old thinking cap and came up with a few choice costume ideas:

1. One half of the Wright Brothers
2. Handy Guy, the guy who carries a door with him where ever he goes
3. A Doorstop
4. Sexy Claims Adjuster
5. Caulk

I'm still pushing for Caulk. I think it would go over well with the ladies.

It's music! Everything is music!
Well, maybe not this. Unless you know how to work the womp-a-womp-wa.

A Triumphant Return to Los Angeles!<b>
Yes my friends, I'm back in LA. After throughly giving South Carolina a good what for, which was capped off by trashing a local bar, rearranging letters on restaurant signs, pissing off an entire hotel, and almost t.p.ing a Burger King for not giving me a shake because they decided to clean the machine early. If it's on the menu, it should be served until close. They're just lucky I'm not a ninja. If I was I'd have real ultimate power, and then they'd be sorry.

Camping with the G-dub!
Yep, apparently, and unbeknownst to me, I have a camp. And the president stayed there. And we got to dress up like army guys, and use binoculars, and chill with Colin Powell. It was neat.

From jump to love in six easy steps...
The visual thesaurus came up again on MeFi today. It's the 3D thesaurus for the new millenium!

I have always found it fascinating how interconnected the English language is, and this site is a great tool to play around with that idea. I tend to waste a little too much time picking two seemingly non-related words and trying to navigate from one to the other. Funny how it always seems to work out.

Catching things
See if you can catch Rob, and while your there, check out all the other great stuff at project-euh.

Retreat... retreat!
Apparently Blogger, the site I use to make this blog, was hacked earlier today. I say apparently, because it did not affect me in the least, having not logged on to it due to copious amounts of classwork. Oh well, them are some good folks over at Pyra you know.

Anyway, back to the miscellanous crap that is this week. Phil, our wonderful landlord, has yet to fix a broken shelf in our kitchen. This normally wouldn't be a big deal, save for that fact that this shelf was originally taken away to be fixed a month ago... a month! The only explanation that I can come up with for this taking so damn long is that Phil was kidnapped by canadian midgets who probed his brain and implanted some kind of chip that renders him mechanically inept. Or his saw broke. Oh wait! He just might be stupid.

I think any of these explanations are as vaild as the next, so I will not make any assumptions catering to his possible stupidity regarding mechanical aptitude. Nonetheless, I believe I am going to have to send him a reminder note.

I don't know about this Timmy
Here is some flash goodness for you all on this fine Thursday. In both penguin and slingshot form.

On a side note, the picture in one of today's student newspapers seemed to imply that it was currently fall outside. Upon further inspection, namely leaving the comfort of lab, I have decided that 1. it definitely is not fall outside, and 2. I hate student newspapers. Well, at least the weather picture person anyway. Thanks for nothing news-jerks.

I am at a loss...
...for how to even describe this crazy cartoon about
Strindberg and helium

Look ma! No heads!
Found some crazy quick flash thingies via Mr. Pants today. Heads up!

Fear the infamous "slow poke"
And you can have your choice, penguins, bunnies, Dave or the elderly.

What would Mean Mr. Mustard think of this?
Even superheros enjoy shaking it to the Ketchup song. (Or is it catsup?)

Cool found crap
I think that the reason that I never find cool stuff on the street is that I am never really looking that hard. Maybe if I paid more attention I would come across stuff like this.

Skeletons in the Closet
For my my premier blog, I just want you all to know that privacy something that you should no longer concern yourselves with. Bog, I got my eye on you.

I am so starving!
Just a trip down the memory lane that is classic onion editorials.

Oh yeah, well I own Canada
Apparently Brooks owns Ohio State.

Everyone's wrong 'cept Bill
MeFi's had some great crap on it in the last couple of days. I think that I survived the awkward "all news all the time" stage and has moved on to the "healthy balance of stuff I like personally like and crap I don't care for" stage. This stage is often known as the "good stage", and I, for one, am going to revel in it as long as possible. So, on that high note, I relay to you the following: Bill O'Reilys Solar Adventure, art critiques for the masses and mayonnaise.

Just like badminton!
Well, maybe just the shuttlecock part. I don't visit The Brunching Shuttlecocks that often any more, but I do believe that I will be purchasing this from them. Crazy brunching fools...

The war to get back the uninterrupted dinner
Of all the anti-telemarketer things I have seen on the net, this script blows everything else out of the water. They even have things for you to say when a caller gets unruly. I think that they should come up with more scripts. Like when I want to order a hot dog or need to ramble incoherently for no particular reason.

Someone seems to have lost their watch...
...and it's up to you to find it. Of course, by watch I really mean "Some unknown prize", and by lost I really mean "hid for some sort of strange treasure hunt". None the less, this Time Hunt thing looks to be pretty cool.

Reason #65848 why I hate the UPS man
Why won't you leave my people alone?!?

Won't somebody please think of the children!
Because if I read this study correctly, some grandkids are going to be very unhappy come the end of the semester. So, for the sake of all that is good in this world, and for fresh baked chocolate chip cookies, won't you please put down your pencils?

Thank you.

Prescription: 1 hot beef injection
Sometimes when you're sitting around reading a book, you wonder if it could really happen. Well, apparently Nelson Demille could be right on the money with regards to Plum Island. The workers are now entering the third month of a strike and the end doesn't seem near. Anyone care for a double Mad Cow Burger with cheese?

R*d*r²
Get it? Math is fun! Except for complex vector algebra. That is not fun right now. Though I am sure it will be fun once I actually learn how to do it. I think I'll look to the great Eric for advice.

Intelligent Play (for quasi-intelligent people)
Sodaplay has been around for awhile, and is always a good time killer, but lately has teamed up with some researchers to test the always popular theory... "Man or machine, which is better?" Personally, I say neither. The only true superstar is that of half-man half-machine Lee Majors. Hot-diggity.

On to the Bright Lights of...
Chester, South Carolina? Yes. That is the name of the grand city I stall be staying in for the next 3 weeks. So this will probably be my last Oct. blog as I will not have computer access most likely. But perhaps I'll send something nice your way. Until then, as a great man known as Wyclef once said: I'll be gone til November.

How about them Minnesohtans?
I am currently attempting to take the Dialect Survey by a Professor from Harvard. It should tell me how I talk. Then you can stop making fun of me... jerks.

I can finally afford a WRX!
Well, relatively speaking of course. I think I might just get one of these in the near future. I would be kind of fun to zoom around. Plus, I heard it's all the rage in Japan... Japan! Of course, this time tomorrow I may have already moved on to other hopes and dreams. And pizza. I like pizza.

I'm a kettle!
What are you? Seriously... click this before you make me sigh louder a second time. Cause the first time is already behind us both by now.

Do I know you from somewhere?
All bands tend to evolve over time, but The White Stripes are looking a bit different nowadays. Maybe it's the hair?

Things Could Get Ugly...
And I'm not talking about some new fugly trying to get all up in the Camino. No sir. I lock the doors when I see that coming my way. (which is much too often, but less so in Cali. as there are less of them out here) What I'm talking about is the impending possibility of a Giants vs. Twins World Series!

Commenting like Dennis Miller
Or John Madden, whomever annoys you more. I think that I found a host for the comments. Let me know if they don't work, or you don't like how they are run. Jerks.

I'm powered by oatmeal!
...and the Bog's powered by Manwich. Yet again, my sweet sweet copper bottomed anti-distortion ring wearing skillet was subjected to the terrible truth that is Manwich. I could see myself enjoying it more if it had, say, any actual food in it save for sauce and meat. All in all, though, I do say "enjoying it more" because I like the stuff. Fills you up and only makes you slightly more bloated than the your average Golden Girl at an all you can eat buffet.

For what it's worth, I think that the flavor of Manwich would lend itself nicely to the media of pudding. I could see the Cos' now... "Come'on kiddies... you gots ta eat man wichity-wich with the spoon and the puddin' cup... woogity woo Teo wit the dyslexia... Huxtable!" I think it would be a smashingly good advert.

...From My Friends in the Van.
Ah yes, Burger King. That whole franchise, but seperately owned thing all over again. Just give me my free fries. Speaking of franchises, Tractor Inc. may have competition. A company named Public. They plan to do everything, starting with t-shirt. Future endeavors include party planning, commercials, etc.. However, no word on them breaking the stronghold on the cape market.

$1.09? You crazy inflationist bastards!
Jess was coming back from Iowa on Sunday, and apparently the Wendy's in Janesville has bumped up the prices on their 99 cent value menu by a dime. Now, normally I would be fine with that, but, of late, the entire point of their advertising campaign has been that the price is still under a buck... even after all these years. I know it's a franchise, but come on. I propose that the national ads say "Except for those Janesville jerk-stores" at the bottom of each one.

Meanwhile, the folks over at BK still contiue to make me smile. Carry on my wayward sons... carry on.

Awww, my neck...
All this studying is really getting to me. Good thing that I have Saint Ursicinus to help me out. That's what he gets for showing up late to "pick a cause signup day". Looks like all the other Saints took all the good causes.

No! No bandito!
(As interjected in an attempted conversation with a friendly Berliner who owns a laundramat)

As far as the German speaking laundry washing contingent is concerened, my roomate and I are apparently Spainish. Aside from that incident, we traveled pretty much free of criminal accusations (except for those Italian customs agents trying to steal our Toblerone), much unlike the good people of Atlanta.

I'm Emmental!
What the crap are you? Welcome to the wonderful world of cheese. I personally like this site the best, if only for its wonderful poetry.

How many relative physicists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two, one to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the universe.

I love the light bulb jokes, and apparently everyone else does too. Caution: the final link contains depictions of cats that may or may not be disturbing to some readers... unfortountely we cannot determine which at this time.

And remember... absolute zero is cool.

Error
This is the coolest 404 page I have ever seen. Ever. Well, except for these. But that's it, I swear.

Look Ma! That Randall [sic] guy is famous
Though, not more famous than Bob Saget (yet). Congrats Rando, you have a number of three. Of course that means I have a number of four. Aaahhh... I love the movies! On a side note, I would like to take this moment to point out the shear magnificence of the Saget connection...

Anger Should Never Be an Active Ingredient.
Caught a new Saturday Morning Cartoon today. It's a mix of Iron Chef and Pokemon. Yep, you heard me right. First the kids compete Iron Chef Style, then the dishes come alive and battle. Of course, there are plenty of culinary puns made throughout the show. It's called Fighting Foodons, and it's on Fox.

Get my camera, it's an old fashioned hole digging
Pulled this one off MeFi. It is an oldie, but a goodie. Kind of like those Nut Goodies. Those are sweet. Oh, and E.L. Fudges are quality too... you know I got some on sale the other day.

Again, with the time wasting already
Well, it only took five weeks, but I finally got a chance to kick up my heels last night at the bars. We ended up at the Pub, and faired pretty well on the old foos tables. I am now determined to get my table put together so I can bone up on the skills. On the same topic of alternatives to actual soccer, I present
Kick Ups.

Let me try again..
That's thoraxcorp. Now it should be in blue. Just like Stew. Assuming he used the shampoo I told him to. Sucka! Fool probably looks like papa smurf now.

Want to be a Star?
So I was talking to a guy that knows some guys, and it just turns out that the guys he knows make Homestarrunner, and a secret site that goes by the name thorazcorp.

Man the cannons!
I would like to think that if I did Civil War reanacting, I would be akin to the great Solo, (ala Mario Van Peebles), but I would probably just turn out to be a
farb.

Listen to the Fonz
...listen real good. Jerk store.

Time for a change?
A quick visit to Metafilter once again confirms that it is not just me who thinks the site has lost its knack for finding neat little obscure web items, but this blog called everlasting blort was mentioned as the new fun place for the whole family to hang out. So far, it looks pretty good.

B is for blue!
Yeah, so I am looking at the color on this site, and I must say that I am none too pleased. Shades of blue may not be my thing, but I will figure it out eventually. In the mean time, and on a completely unrelated note, check out Homestarrunner for fun and stuff.

Guess who called?
I'm going to start my own art gallery. It's going to be called "Jerk Art Store... for Jerks". I'm sure I'll see Stew there.

Mavis Beacon, eat your heart out
If I was ever sitting at home thinking, "How can I come up with a game that involves typing and sharks", I think I would have picked this.

Who's working on post styling?
me! Fun eh? (get it?)

X and Y? I don't get it?
Since I don't have access to Crayons & Razors right now, I figured I would just home cook myself up a little blog action over here. One point to note... this is (hopefully) only temporary, and I will be back to my original craptacular blog soon. Of course, for those that know me (and those that no longer want to) temporary has a unique way of working itself right up to permanent.

Because I'm a pirate
Yarrrgh.

And Stew... a quick phone check will reveal yet another minute lost.

El New Blog (Spanish for "the new blog")
So... it's 11 at night, and I seem to have found yet another way to evade doing actual homework. Welcome to the big (little) show.